Anne DeSantis
We often hear people described as either “givers” or “takers.” If we are honest, most of us have probably been both at different times in our lives. Yet the Gospel continually calls us away from a life centered primarily on ourselves and toward a life that notices, welcomes, and gives to others.
A “taker” does not necessarily intend to be selfish. Sometimes we simply become so absorbed in our own lives, our families, our responsibilities, and even our accomplishments that we stop noticing the people God has placed around us.
We may readily share the highlights of our lives, especially through social media, while rarely taking the time to learn about another person’s story, struggles, or pain.
As Catholics, we receive so much. We receive baptism, we receive holy Communion, and we receive forgiveness and grace through the sacrament of reconciliation. Throughout our lives, we are continually receiving God’s mercy, love, guidance, and the gift of belonging to the Body of Christ.
Yet perhaps an important question for each of us is this: What are we doing with everything we have received? In a world filled with loneliness, sadness, division, and a lack of meaningful support, Christians are called not simply to receive God’s love but to become instruments of that love for others.
Giving Doesn’t Have to Be Grand
We have many beautiful examples in the lives of the saints of what it means to give ourselves to others. St. Thérèse of Lisieux showed us through her “little way” that seemingly small acts performed with great love have tremendous value.
Loving attention, patience, kindness, and presence may appear insignificant, but to someone who feels forgotten or unseen, these simple gifts can mean more than we realize. Giving someone our time and our attentive presence is not a small thing at all.
St. Teresa of Calcutta gave us another extraordinary example of giving. She saw Christ in people whom society could easily overlook and devoted herself to serving them with dignity and love.
Dorothy Day, through the Catholic Worker Movement, also demonstrated that our Catholic faith cannot remain something private or simply something we practice on Sunday. Her faith moved her to recognize the dignity of people who were poor and marginalized and to respond personally to their needs.
These witnesses remind us that the Gospel always moves us outward, beyond ourselves and toward the needs of another person.
The Gift of Listening
For the past several years, I have had the privilege of mentoring a young woman. What initially began as offering some guidance regarding work gradually developed into a friendship. Over the years, we have had many conversations, and often my role has simply been to listen.
There have been times when I have wondered whether I was really “helping.” I didn’t necessarily have an answer to every problem, nor could I fix every difficult situation. Many of our conversations have consisted largely of me listening while she shared what was happening in her life, but perhaps that listening has been part of the gift.
We sometimes underestimate just how substantial the gift of listening can be. To give someone our time without rushing them, trying to fix them, or simply waiting for our opportunity to speak is a profound act of love. Listening communicates that another person’s life matters, that his or her story is worth hearing, and that someone cares enough to be present.
Through this friendship and through many people I have encountered in ministry, I have learned how hungry people can be for this kind of presence. I have also learned how difficult it can be sometimes for us to give even a small portion of our time and attention to another person.
Affability — making ourselves approachable and pleasant in our interactions with others — may seem like a small virtue, but it too can become a powerful way of living the Gospel. Warmth, attentiveness, encouragement, and genuine interest in another person cost us very little, yet they may mean everything to someone going through a difficult time.
We do not need to change thousands of lives to make a difference. God may simply be asking us to notice the one person who needs a telephone call, the person sitting alone, the young person who needs encouragement, the older person who needs companionship, or the struggling friend who needs someone willing to listen.
The difference one person can make often begins in these small and ordinary encounters. In his November 2025 homily for the World Day of the Poor, Pope Leo XIV offered a beautiful reminder: “Let us, then, be attentive to others, to each person, wherever we are,” while “reaching out to the marginalized and becoming witnesses of God’s tenderness.”
May we strive to become those witnesses of God’s tenderness, remembering that sometimes changing the world begins simply by giving our time, our attention, and our love to the person God has placed right in front of us.
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Dr. Anne DeSantis is a national Catholic speaker and author who attends St. Mary Parish in Schwenksville. She is the executive director of the St. Raymond Nonnatus Foundation for Freedom, Family, and Faith, a nonprofit dedicated to offering pastoral support and accompaniment to individuals and families in crisis. To learn more, visit AnneDeSantis.com.
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